I feel like I’m always working these days. When I’m not actually at the café, I’m at home working on my business or working on the house. I’m finding that being deliberate about every use of my time is a must if my family’s needs are also going to be met.

The good news is, I’m not taking those precious times with my kids for granted. The books, snuggles, rambunctious play, the teaching, the laughing…it’s all getting stored up and looked forward to every minute. I am grateful for lessons learned in hard times.

There’s been a lot of disappointment already this year, for us and for those we love…but tonight in my wanderings I found so many small but bright reminders that God is in control. I need some time before I tell you what those glimmers were…but whether or not they work out I’m glad for them. I’ve missed a few great opportunities over the last few years, but what that tells me is that there are ALWAYS opportunities moving through our lives. Which ones work out is up to God.

In other news: we’ve received a date for our son’s Speech Assessment! Thanks for your continued prayers!


Phew…and Sorry

I really didn’t consider, before I said I’d write every day, just how busy I was going to be! And after the busyness, how much I would need time just spent investing in relationships, in prayer, in quiet…and important things like taking the kids sledding!  (Photo Credit goes to my wonderful sister-in-law, who was also a part of this Important Event).

Anyway, sorry, folks! Rest assured I wasn’t just avoiding this! Let’s pick up where we left off, shall we?

I’m sure there are those of you wondering how our appointment with the Developmental Pediatrician went. I’m happy to say it went very VERY well. I am SO pleased with this doctor! She doesn’t believe in labeling for the sake of labeling, for one thing. She wants DS to get the help he needs to help him have a fulfilling, successful life, but feels that giving us a label for “what’s going on” would only be moderately helpful. So, we’re taking it one step at a time, observing him, getting him in with the Speech Language Pathologist…but for now not worrying about naming what it is he has. And it may yet turn out to be just a developmental “quirk”…there’s still so much we have to learn about child development and the brain!

Anyway, no real “answers” I guess, but to me that’s less the point. And I’d rather we all take our time instead of jumping to a pet diagnosis (something this doctor is extremely aware of as a danger). We left feeling that we were heard, that there is help available, and with a sense of reassurance that there are people on our side and next steps to take. So, praise God for that!

I must say that in all the craziness of the tough times we’ve been facing, God has been there every step of the way. I’ve been scared sometimes, but there has always been His comfort. There have been times when we’ve wondered whether things would work out, but God has come through every time with the right answer to the problem at hand. When I’ve been stressed, He’s given me rest. None of this has been according to my plan, but I’m at peace knowing that it’s all going according to His plan. God is so good. All the time. Even when times are tough. No, ESPECIALLY then.

All over the place

I’m afraid my thoughts aren’t very well organized tonight. I have a lot on my mind, not the least of which is an appointment with the Developmental Pediatrician tomorrow to check on my son. Before you worry, we don’t think it’s anything serious…just something that we need to understand, to equip us to help him be all that he can be (now isn’t that a flashback to the banners that were hung all over my elementary school). Prayers are still appreciated, mostly for peace and for wisdom on the Doctor’s part.

Tonight I’m grateful for truth, for learning, and for God’s ever-relevant Word. Here are some verses I’ve been struck by tonight:

“Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need. ” – Ephesians 4:28 (emphasis mine)
Now that’s as good a reason as I’ve ever heard to lead a productive life.

“The wicked earns deceptive wages,
But he who sows righteousness gets a true reward. ” – Proverbs 11:18
Ever tempted to do things the way the world does because it seems to be working out for them? It’s actually not. 

“There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword,
But the tongue of the wise brings healing. ” – Proverbs 12:18  (This was the verse I was actually trying to find when I found the previous one)
I’m guilty far too often of speaking rashly…God, help me to be a healer instead.

Agh…I’ve got a few more things on my mind, but I feel I’m at risk of making this a never-ending ramble of a post. Anyway, I should rest. Goodnight, and “now may the Lord of peace Himself continually grant you peace in every circumstance.” – 2 Thessalonians 3:16 (emphasis mine)

Depend – a change of seasons

Inspired by a friend’s commitment, I’ve determined that for one week I will “show up” here every day, just to write…anything. I’m dropping the notion that it has to be perfect and just letting it be.

Things have changed around here a lot in the last while. My husband and I have both effectively become self-employed, and I went back to work as a Barista to ease the uncertainty of that.

We’ve been learning a lot. I’ve had a lot of preconceptions about how my life was going to go challenged…and that’s for the better, really. It’s not easy, by any stretch, but there’s that whole pressure-makes-diamonds thing that makes me grateful for it anyway (hey, I DID learn something from my little Thankfulness exercise…wait…was that the last time I wrote?! Well I guess there was that artist thing…)

Best lesson so far? Learning that calling myself “strong and independent” doesn’t actually make me trying to be self-reliant any better. I’ve had to depend so much on God, on my husband, on other people…but I’m finding that that’s okay. Really, that’s what we’re meant for. There’s physically no way to pull yourself up by your bootstraps, and the same goes for the rest of life.

Also, this whole spending the last couple years learning how to manage our finances well thing? REALLY coming in handy right now. I’ll talk more about that later.

Anyway,  all this to say we’re okay. Thanks to God. We’re okay.

A Week of Giving Thanks: Day 6 – For Change

Sorry for the tardiness…I did MOSTLY write this yesterday, but work took over and I had to put this aside for a few hours to save my sanity…and then I went to bed, forgetting it.

I’ll admit it: I’m usually the first one to grumble when Facebook changes the way I get my social media fix. I didn’t like it when my favourite independent coffee shop embraced a modern, uptown look instead of sticking with the old-world feel I’d known through my growing up years. It took me over a year to admit that, yes, leggings are rather comfy, and perhaps wide flared pants could take a break for a few years (we’re JUST on a break!) But none of that compares to the way I feel about spiritual growing pains, the rock-hard feeling in my stomach that groans, “but that’s just how I am! There’s no changing that,”  and then the cracking of my walls as I begin to admit that maybe God’s right (ya think?)

But as I peer out into a world of golden leaves and shimmering frost, I must admit there’s something to be said for change. Without change, we’d never see sunrise and sunset or the shifting colours of the seasons. Without change I would never have made most of the friends I have today, be married to my wonderful husband, or have two beautiful, growing children. And without change, how could we be transformed into the people God wants us to be?

I am grateful for change, painful or no.